I thought I share this with everyone, just out of bordom.
WARNING: Contains Mature Content. Proceed at your own risk!
And now, without further adue...




1. Vin Diesel once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors.

2. If you rearrange the letters in Vin Diesel it reveals his credo: "I End Lives."

3. There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Vin Diesel allows to live.

4. When Vin Diesel goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.

5. Vin Diesel's birth name was Turd Furgeson

6. There is no "I" in team. There are two "I"s in Vin Diesel. Fuck you, team.

7. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Vin Diesel could use to kill you, including the room itself.

8. Vin Diesel has always been able to find Waldo, except for one time. He found himself stumped on the last page of Where's Waldo Now?, not being able to find the Waldo without a shoe. He threw the book down and screamed, "This is BULLSHIT!" They're all wearing shoes." He then proceeded to eat the book and exclaim, "IF I CAN'T FIND WALDO, THEN NO ONE CAN!" The book he ate belonged to a child that he had borrowed it from. The child began to cry and Vin ate him for good measure. The incident has since been refered to as Christmas.

9. Vin Diesel can win a game of Monopoly without owning any property.

10. Vin Diesel is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

11. Vin Diesel once beat Super Mario Bros 3 without even touching his Nintendo controller. He just yelled at his TV in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich, and the game beat itself out of fear.

12. Vin Diesel is powered by the tears of the Chupakabra.

13. Vin Diesel has two speeds: walk and kill.

14. When Vin Diesel jumps into a body of water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Vin instead.

15. When Vin Diesel was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Vin Diesel!" Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with.

16. Vin Diesel can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.

17. If you were to lock Vin Diesel in a room with a guitar, a year later you would have the greatest album ever, it would sweep the Grammy's. When asked why he doesn't do this Vin replied "Because Grammy's are for queers." then he ate a knife to show the seriousness of his response.

18. Vin Diesel played Russian Roulete with a fully loaded gun and won.

19. Vin Diesel was the hunter who shot Bambi's Mother. He then wore her carcass like it was a coat while he made his rounds at the local children's hospital.

20. It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

21. Vin Diesel coined the phrase, "I could eat a Horse" after he ate every last unicorn in existence.

22. Vin Diesel is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's shit.

23. When Vin Diesel does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

24. On his birthday, Vin Diesel randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

25. Vin Diesel can divide by zero.

26. In fine print at on the last page of the Guiness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Vin Diesel, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone has ever come to matching him.

27. Vin Diesel's hair is too afraid of him to grow.

28. Magnetic compasses do not point toward true North - they point in the direction of Vin Diesel. He just likes to sit on a lawn chair and shout, "Jackets are for pussies!" at the Acrtic researchers.

29. You are what you eat. That is why Vin Diesel's diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children.

30. During a stay at Neverland Ranch in the 80's, Vin Diesel was awoken by Michael Jackson who was trying to sneak into his bed. Vin punched Jackson so hard that he knocked the black right off of him.

31. Everytime a child finds his faith, an angel gets its wings. Everytime an angel gets it's wings, Vin Diesel shoots it down with a rocket launcher, which is ironicly located in his pelvic region.

32. Vin Diesel's responsible for the extinction of the dinosaurs. A Diplodocus said his mom was fat so he killed each and every dinosaur with an icepick and a baseball bat wrapped in 40-grit sandpaper.

33. I once witnessed Vin Diesel take the life out of a goat utilizing only the enzymes found in seaweed. Following this, Vin skinned the goat, made a hot air balloon out of the skin, ballooned to Sri Lanka, where upon which he made love to the French Presidents wife. After the love making, they feasted on the goat carcass. Vin was still blinded by hunger after the goat, so he ate the Presidents wife as well.

34. Vin Diesel injected cookie-batter into his bowels, and then took a crap. Hence, Pocky sticks were born.

35. Vin Diesel scaled Mt. Kilimanjaro by his teeth in a fortnight, reportedly bringing only some tofurky and the tanned hide of Spice Girl Geri Halliwell with him for the journey.

36. Vin Diesel uses wasp killer as deodorant.

37.The first rule of Vin Diesel Club is you do not talk about Vin Diesel Club. The second rule is that you have to let Vin Diesel see you naked.

38. When in Rome, Vin Diesel does not do as the Romans do.

39. Vin Diesel invented toilet paper, before he did everyone wiped their ass with old hair obtained from barber shops. Hence the rise of hair stylists and the fall of barbers.

40. On the day they stole his hat, Vin Diesel put a jihad on them, and if you dont like it, he'll put a jihad on you too.

41. Vin Diesel takes the phrase "Breakfast of Champions" literally. He once ate Tiger Woods, Wayne Gretzky, and Russel Crowe in one meal.

42. Vin Diesel can crack walnuts with his anus.

43. Vin Diesel receives no sustenance from food nor water, but is instead kept alive by his own smug sense of self-satisfaction.

44. Vin Diesel is able to project his astral self beyond walls and doors in order to spy on his enemies.

45. Vin Diesel single handedly built the pyramids entirely out of strategicly performed pop n' lock dance moves and alien fecal material.

46. When Vin Diesel laughs, the whole world laughs with him. When Vin Diesel kills, the whole world dies.

47. Vin Diesel once used Gary Coleman as a hand puppet. Coleman said the experience changed his life and led him to give up smoking.

48. Vin Diesel knows where in the world Carmen San Diego is. And he impregnated Gumshoes. And Rockapella.

49. Vin Diesel does not actually run on diesel. He actually runs on a high octane fuel which is made by mixing environmentally friendly LPG with the souls of the damned.

50. If Vin Diesel was an ice cream flavor, he'd be Mint I'll-Smash-Your-Face-In-With-A-Shovel.

51. Peter Piper may have picked a peck of pickled peppers but Vin Diesel planted the seeds and bit Peter in half for picking his fucking peppers.

52. Vin is solely responsible for every flight in the history of the US space program. there is no such thing as rockets. he just stands beneath the shuttle and plunches it. the rest is pyrotechnics.

53. Peanuts are allergic to Vin Diesel.

54. Vin Diesel is neither heterosexual nor homosexual. He is only sexually attracted to blue light.

55. William Shatner was originally supposed to shout "VIN DIESELLLL!," but Vin Diesel showed him how to shorten it into one syllable; hence, "KHAAAAAN!"

56. Vin Diesel is really the reincarnated King Nebuchadnezzar. He made the Hanging Gardens when he decided to use Rogaine on his genitals.

57. Vin Diesel once dated Henri Winkler.

58. The world used to spin the other way, but that was before Vin Diesel sneezed.

59. Vin Diesel's penis has an opposable thumb that allows him to fire three guns at once.

60. Vin Diesel's new fragrance is derived from his sweat and ejaculate. Not sold in the U.S. (pending FDA approval), it will be marketed abroad as, "Fumes," with the tag-line, "Not only will this make you smell like Vin Diesel, it'll get you laid too, pussy."

61. The eternal conundrum "what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object" was finally solved when Vin Diesel punched himself in the face.

62. The Tripods in the movie "War of the Worlds" are based on Vin Diesel's own custom built vehicle, even down to the killer heat beams. The Vinmobile lacks the cages filled with human prisoners however, instead opting to be fuelled on fossil fuels and whale eggs.

63. Vin Diesel's upper bicuspid is named Thailand and his pectorals are named East and West Berlin.

64. Vin Diesel can kill a man before he can scream. And if the man does scream, Vin has a back-up plan that involves a bag of Cheetos and a roll of duct tape.

65. Vin Diesel always wakes up on the wrong side of the bed, even if it is surrounded by walls.

66. No one can kill Vin Diesel, for a microchip surgically implanted onto his heart will release a deadly bio-chemical gas that will destroy the world.

67. Vin Diesel created and recorded the theme to Muppet Babies.

68. There's more to come, I seriously found like 3,000 volumes on Vin Diesel alone, and many other books on ancient lore contain tales of his exploits. I think I'll leave out the one about the blood of the blond-haired virgins, at midnight on October 31, while a basilisk offers its first crow from being hatched of a rooster's egg. That one's a bit odd.

69. Vin Diesel is the reason Cap'n. Crunch was turned down for his promotion to admiral.

70. A few people can lift Thor's hammer, but Vin Diesel's the only one who can beat Thor's ass with it.

71. Vin Diesel saw and conquered, but hasn't come yet.

72. When Vin Diesel orders a Bloody Mary, he insists that it contains small shards of glass from smashed church stained glass windows for extra flavour and purity, along side all the various other ingredients required for said drink.

73. Vin Diesel uses the Ark of the Covenant to store his D&D dice.

74. He was created by the D&D Corporation to give nerds false hope that they too can grow up to be attractive and cool.

75. The Legend of Zelda is based on the adventures of Vin Diesel battling Adolph Hitler and the Nazis in World War 2.

76. Vin Diesel found Nemo.

77. When Alexander Graham Bell made the first phone call, it was to Vin Diesel. His answering machine picked it up.

78. Vin Diesel catches diseases in the literal sense.

79. Vin Diesel tortured everyone at the Geneva Convention until they signed the agreement.

80. Vin Diesel beat up Mike Tyson from 2,000 miles away using nothing but a power glove and the soundtrack from The Wizard.

81. When Vin Diesel is sad, magical puppies appear to cheer him up.

82. Windows ME never crashes if Vin Diesel is at the keyboard.

83. J.R.R. Tolkein wrote The Lord of the Rings as a thank to Vin Diesel after he beat the shit out of his next door neighbor's dog who shat on Tolkein's lawn.

84. Vin Diesel only did the film the "Fast and the Furious" because he thought it was about the fable of Tourtise and the Hare.

85. For every Vin Diesel there is an opposite Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel heard about this and promptly destroyed his opposite self. This created a paradox that unraveled the space-time continuum. Consequently, we are currently living inside Vin Diesel's imagination.

86. Vin Diesel lives in a castle that he built by hand using bricks made of the compressed souls of the damned.

87. Every time Michael Jackson did the Moonwalk, it wasn't actually himself dancing but Vin Diesel using the force on him. He did that because he wanted to get laid by Princess Diana in a car. Eventually, it worked, but after the brakes collapsed Vin made a nose dive into the Seine.

88. Vin Diesel is not only a man, but also a state of mind and being, only attainable through the consumption of a specific combination of precisely incremented narcotics, transmission fluid, and twinkies. He is the only man who knows the correct combination, and he'd rather impale himself on a rusty pole than tell you.

89. The name 'Vin' comes from the latin meaning of 'he who has fucking awesomeness'. The name Diesel comes from a McDonalds happy meal toy of the hamburglar and means 'made in South Korea'.

90. After completing a hard-fought game of Risk against, well, himself, Vin Diesel likes nothing better than to pick up a skipping rope and work himself up to a light pace of 5,378 skips per second. He can also slow down his heart rate to one heart beat every February 28th; That's slower than it takes Jeff Goldblum to complete a sentence.

91. Vin Diesel has never set foot in a classroom, but rather was educated by a combination of I Love Lucy reruns and LSD.

92. Vin Diesel once peed on a third rail of the New York City subway system and subsequently caused the blackout of 2003.

93. Vin Diesel was the first person to break the sound barrier on foot.

94. Vin Diesel once had an adventure with three gay ducks and a time machine. This is now referred to as Kwanzaa.

95. Until Taxes came along, Death and Vin Diesel were the only constants in life.

96. Contrary to popular belief, Vin Diesel's balls cannot be used as a life raft. They can however be used as a sea anchor for large cruise ships.

97. Vin Diesel's skull is actually made of the powder of ground up bones from the Jabberwock.

98. When Vin Diesel thinks of the starving children of Africa, his tears make the skies above them cloud up and rain - a rain of pure acid that kills all the livestock and crops. But his smile can light up a room.

99. Vin Diesel claims to have the Bible's lost pages which consist of a Calvin and Hobbes strip and a recipe for jerk chicken.

100. If this is the 100th consecutive Vin Diesel fact you have read, Vin Diesel will do something nice for you in the next week, but only if you send this message to 10 people in next 10 minutes.



In case you wonder, I found these interesting facts here - [link]
Hope you enjoyed it...